The Ruby Slippers, Rejection, and Me

by: Martha Anne Toll

I still can’t make it through The Wizard of Oz. Watching the film as a small child, the Wicked Witch of the West traumatized me for life. 

However, I love the phrase, “there’s no place like home,” and I adore Dorothy’s ruby slippers and what they signify. 

One part of Dorothy’s journey is about learning to trust herself. Through a series of unpredictable, hair-raising moments, she relies on inner strength to comfort the Tin Man, the Lion and the Scarecrow. Yet if Dorothy had been interviewed mid-adventure, she would have denied that she carried the means to her own rescue. It took a journey through Oz to realize she owned the power to return home; she just needed to trust her instincts.

Dorothy inspires me because, at its core, writing is about trusting our writerly instincts. That trust must co-exist and grow in the face of rejection, writing’s older sibling. Every writer gets rejections, and most writers get a hell of a lot of them. I will never learn to let rejections roll off, but I have come to understand they’re an integral member of my writing family. Rejections challenge us to trust our writing. And let’s admit it, they can offer sensible editing suggestions worthy of attention.

It was 16 years between when I signed with my first agent and when I sold my debut novel. During the interim, I had plenty of publication acceptances, thankfully, but I could not sell any of the several novels I had been writing. During those long years, I developed new and creative ways to worry about publishing: I never got an MFA (never mind that I graduated law school); I didn’t know the right people. But those concerns were too facile. The worst kinds of worries are the ones turned inward—I can’t do this; I’m not good enough. Those worries are insidious and debilitating. 

Vacillating between foolhardy optimism and despair, I went to hear the great Irish novelist Anne Enright speak. She said (I paraphrase): “Ask any debut novelist what number novel their debut really is. For most of them, it’s their sixteenth.” That sounded right to me. Between drafts, revisions, and novels in the drawer, I easily topped that number. 

Armed with Enright’s wisdom, and the support of friends, family, and my writing community, who told me not to give up, I began to realize I was wearing Dorothy’s ruby slippers. The rejections didn’t stop coming, and I didn’t sell a novel for a long time after that. But I started to trust my writing instincts. And I stopped looking for rational patterns in my rejections. 

I flipped the script and began to discover that I might already know how to make my manuscripts stronger, that I owned the means to critique and revise my work. I started following my favorite writing advice: aim for 100 rejections a year. Although I continued to benefit from feedback from others, I started to acknowledge (to myself) that not everyone knew more about my book than I did. I had opinions, and I was entitled to them, and they might strengthen my work if I could learn to listen to them. Maybe I did have the means to figure out how to bring a manuscript home. 

It may take longer than we can imagine, but sometimes if we click our heels, we realize that we are there already. 

Martha Anne Toll writes fiction, essays, and book reviews, and reads anything that’s not nailed down. Her debut novel, Three Muses, won the Petrichor Prize for Finely Crafted Fiction and is forthcoming from Regal House Publishing on September 20, 2022. Martha brings a long career in social justice to her work covering BIPOC and women writers. She is a book reviewer and author interviewer at NPR Books, the Washington Post, The Millions, and elsewhere; and publishes short fiction and essays in a wide variety of outlets.

NYT Bestseller Karen McManus On Pacing In Murder Mysteries & Bowing Out of Social Media

Today's guest is Karen McManus, NYT Bestselling author of multiple YA murder mysteries, including her newest release, Nothing More to Tell. Karen joined me to talk about pacing, plot and motive in murder mysteries, as well as knowing when social media isn't helping you anymore.

Listen to the Episode Now

Penny Goetjen on The Inspiration for The Woman Underwater

Inspiration is a funny thing. It can come to us like a lightning bolt, through the lyrics of a song, or in the fog of a dream. Ask any writer where their stories come from and you’ll get a myriad of answers, and in that vein I created the WHAT (What the Hell Are you Thinking?) interview. 

Today’s guest for the WHAT is Penny Goetjen, author of The Woman Underwater

Ideas for our books can come from just about anywhere, and sometimes even we can’t pinpoint exactly how or why. Did you have a specific origin point for your book?

For The Woman Underwater, the original snippet of an idea for the story came from a scene in Robin William’s movie Dead Poets Society. I was intrigued by the room in the attic where the boys stored their trunks during the school year. I got to thinking of how someone could hide or something could be hidden there for an extended period of time and no one would be the wiser. From there, I reflected on the experiences our sons had a private boarding school in Connecticut and characters began to develop as well as the gist of the story. I dug in and started writing, enjoying the journey along the way. 

I’m often amused by the origin of my inspiration. While I was writing the second book in my Precipice Series set on the coast of Maine, I was outside for some fresh air, deep in thought about how to have my antagonist make a dramatic entrance so he would have witnesses to corroborate his timing. At that moment a small plane flew over and it came to me that he would arrive by seaplane. Problem solved.

Once the original concept existed, how did you build a plot around it?

I’m one of those fiction writers who doesn’t plot. I’ve always loved to write but in school when a teacher would assign an essay and we had to construct an outline first, I thought I was going to stop breathing before I came up with it. I hated writing an outline then, and I still do. I actually tried it recently in an attempt to be “more efficient” writing my next book. It was a painful process but I finally completed my outline. The only problem was that when I started to write, my brain thought I’d already written the story, so I struggled to get the words down. It was brutal. I won’t try that again. Clearly, I need to let the characters take the lead and escort me through the story. 

Have you ever had the plot firmly in place, only to find it changing as the story moved from your mind to paper?

My plot is never firmly in place and I like it that way—so does my subconscious. When I finish a writing session, I truly believe my subconscious takes over and ruminates on where the story will go next. When I pick up the next day, I read the previous couple of pages to familiarize where I (we) left off and then I start into writing without hesitation. 

Those of us who write like this—and it’s quite common—are called pantsers because we write by the seat of our pants. And honestly, it’s a blast. I often don’t know what’s coming on the next page and can be as surprised as the reader. 

Early on in my writing, I questioned whether or not I was going about it the right way. Was I cutting corners? Was I supposed to suck it up and write the outline first? Then I read an interview with Stephen King in which he revealed he’s a pantser, so at that moment all doubts about my writing style evaporated.

Do the story ideas come to you often, or is fresh material hard to come by?

My stories are character driven and there’s usually no shortage of characters pestering me to write about them. If I were ever lacking a character or two, I could spend some time people watching. Besides the fact that it’s fascinating, I end up jotting down observations in the notes app on my phone so I don’t forget any of the juicy details that makes a person so interesting. The only problem is I have hundreds of notes, and I’ve never been accused of being overly organized.

A recent trip through the Orlando airport provided some entertaining character “research.” By the time I’d reached baggage claim, I’d filled a page of notes. I mean, grown humans with offspring in tow sporting all manner of Disney attire is a sight to behold. One of my favorite “characters” was a rather large woman with a flouncy, red and white polka dot Minnie skirt, knee length compression shorts that peeked out from under the hem, a skin-tight sleeveless white t-shirt that defined every—well, you get the idea. 

How do you choose which story to write next, if you’ve got more than one percolating?

My subconscious seems to be in the driver’s seat for this as well, steering me in the direction to take with respect to the next story. It always seems that when I’m midway through writing the current novel, the idea for the next one introduces itself, as if my subconscious wants to let me know there’s another adventure on the horizon and to keep things moving so I can get to the next project. Nothing like a subconscious with a sense of urgency!

I have 6 cats and a Dalmatian (seriously, check my Instagram feed) and I usually have at least one or two snuggling with me when I write. Do you have a writing buddy, or do you find it distracting?

I have two of the most adorable (we’re all objective about our pets, right?) Miniature Schnauzers who love to hang out with me while I write, but not always at the same time. I tend to move around to different locations within the house so I don’t get bored with my surroundings (and to avoid my messy office) so depending on the location there may only be room for one pup at a time, like on my favorite upholstered chair. Under my desk you will often see two salt and pepper-colored, wet-nosed sweethearts with the cutest floppy ears, expressive white eyebrows, and full-on, masculine-looking beards. But somehow those girls pull it off. In the winter, they’re great feet warmers which comes in handy since I wear flip flops year round. 

Penny Goetjen writes murder mysteries where the milieus play as prominent a role as the engaging characters. A self-proclaimed eccentric known for writing late into the night, transfixed by the allure of flickering candlelight, Ms. Goetjen embraces the writing process, unaware what will confront her at the next turn. She rides the journey with her characters, often as surprised as her readers to see how the story unfolds. Fascinated with the paranormal, she usually weaves a subtle, unexpected twist into her stories.